Name Dropping: What A Drag - Part Deux genre: Gaylingual & Tongue-In-Cheek

Nuclia Waste

I did a posting quite a while back on how people pick drag names and I ended the posting with a list of drag names that had food as the theme. Thought Theater readers had a lot of fun with the posting so I though I would bring it back with a new theme...anything medical. My starter list is at the end of the posting...feel free to add your own in the comments and we'll see how many we can create. Oh, I've also included a link to a site that will create a drag name for's just before my list of names at the bottom of this entry.

It's common knowledge that a drag queens name may be as important as the rhinestone regalia he/she wears. The conventional approach (although I would say that it's more urban legend than actual fact) is to take the name of your first pet and add it to your mother's maiden name and have your drag name. Chances are you won't like the name if you try it...of course that's only if you were inclined to have a drag name. As with Seinfeld speak...not that there's anything wrong with that.

I ran across an interesting article that indicates that there is an art to name selection and to become an actual namer is no easy task. The study of names is an adjunct to the study of linguistics and dialects and given the attached humor it seems to get the lion's share of the attention. The article is from the San Francisco Chronicle (duh!) and I've included some interesting excerpts below. Following the article segments (full article here)

"My drag queen name, for the record," said Professor Ronald C. Butters of Duke University, speaking between academic paper presentations in a beige room on the second floor of the Oakland Marriott, "is Coco Butters."

The room tittered appreciatively. If any crowd of buttoned-up academics could enjoy a good drag queen name, this was it. Butters was presiding over a recent panel on "Queer Names of Stage, Screen and Fiction" at the American Names Society conference, held in conjunction with the Linguistic Society of America, the American Dialect Society and three other groups. The conference, held in early January, drew people from all over the country and the world, and, in addition to official business (the Linguistic Society's vote on "Word of the Year," for instance), there were three days of overlapping panels and paper presentations.

The subjects covered by American Name Society, though, stood out in a sea of obscure papers on obscure topics. Perhaps the broader appeal of its work has to do with the universal nature of its mission statement; the society, founded in 1951, "seeks to find out what really is in a name."

Who knew that although drag queens usually employ sexual innuendo or humor in their stage names, it is strikingly uncommon for male gay porn stars to do so? Apparently, bland names are perceived to be more attractive.

Unsurprisingly, many drag queens chose honorifics such as Lady and Miss and upwardly mobile names like Xaviar Onassis Bloomingdale or, less frequently, overtly lower-class monikers such as Winnie Baygo or Mary K. Mart. Ethnic stereotypes got some play too, with China Silk and Bang Bang Ledesh.

How does one become a namer? Members of the American Name Society enter the world of naming from many directions.

Ed Lawson, a professor emeritus at SUNY Fredonia and former president of the American Name Society, was a psychologist who studied stereotypes before focusing on names. In one study, he selected a group of young women with "ethnically nonspecific faces" and gave them three ethnically distinctive names for three groups of subjects. Sure enough, Lawson found that people's impressions were colored by the perceived culture of the names. "The Jewish girls were labeled smart, the Italian girls were seen as passionate, and so on, " Lawson said.

When asked about the persistent Internet meme about how to choose a porn star name (some combination of first pet's name or mother's maiden name or your middle name with the street name of your first address), Zwicky laughed. "No, I didn't see any evidence of those games at play in my study. I, for one, couldn't get a good porn name from that. My first dog's name was Spot."

But as Zwicky noted in his presentation, he has no data on what, if any, impact a name has on a porn career.

A name isn't a porn star's most salient feature.

I found another site that lets you enter your real name and it will create a drag name for you...from what I can tell the names it assigns are random...but it's still fun to see the names it generates

OK, now on to the fun. Here's my list of "medical" drag names:

Angie O. Plasty - That ought to get your blood flowing again.

Sister Ectomy - Can you have your sister removed?

Carlin Oscopy - Isn't that a kick in the backside?

Ginger Vitis - I hear she can remove her teeth.

Halle Tosis - Poor girl has never been kissed.

Amie O. Centesis - After all, you want to know if she's a boy or a girl, right?

Carmen Electralytes - You're gonna need some of this after all those drinks.

Anna Stesia - She's cute but boring...she'll put you to sleep in no time.

Wanda Cass Tration - She'll make your mamas and papas scream.

Gina Lola Frigida - Hot as hell but cold as ice.

Aunty Biotic - She's the one for you if you've been a really bad boy or girl.

Barri M. Enema - Shake shake shake...shake your booty.

Cesaria Section - She's a hotty...but she's been known to leave you scarred for life.

Kathi Terizenem - It's gonna hurt like hell when she pulls it out.

Madame Ovary - They wrote a book about her exploits.

OK, now it's your turn...I've gotta run...I'm late for my Doctor's appointment.

Daniel DiRito | May 2, 2007 | 7:05 PM
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